Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!
Monday, December 25, 2006
Thursday, December 14, 2006
It's Official - I Can Never Leave College Again
I have one more class tonight during which I have to watch the last group presentation, and then I have a take-home exam to drop off for another class, but for all intents and purposes I am done for the semester. Granted, the last few weeks have been busy both for classes and for my assistantship (job), but busy in a good way. While I don't like being busy any more than anyone else, I nonetheless can see in myself the rush I get when faced with things to get done. And thus far, my efforts have all been duly rewarded.
A major change since this time last year.
Last November through March was the lowest point I have ever been in my life. I worked my ass off trying to do my job, and the harder I worked the harder I fell when that work did not yield any more positive results. I would drag myself out of bed every morning, suffer through another futile day of trying to educate children who would fit better in a prison than a school, and then come home and lie on the couch from about 5:00 - 10:00 before pushing myself to try and develop another lesson plan. I went to see a counselor about it, and the basic analysis we came up with was that I hated my job and my situation, and that I wouldn't be happy until I could change those things.
I can't argue with him. Thanks, doc.
I haven't felt this empowered and alive since I left Ann Arbor 3 years ago. I thought maybe it was just associated with U of M and my positions there, but I feel the same sense of purpose and drive now that I did there. I actually enjoyed writing 18 pages for an 8-12 page final paper because once I started on it I was "in the zone". I enjoyed getting through a whole list of responsibilities in my office last week. For both my efforts, I got a 100% for the semester in that class, and a great evaluation from my supervisor.
Living back in Holland two years ago, I thought I was losing my mental sharpness. I felt like Charlie Gordon from Flowers for Algernon, knowing that he was regressing to his previously feeble intellect but unable to stop it. Being back in college, I feel like my mind is working at a million miles an hour. I feel like I'm mentally back at full strength again, and sometimes even stronger. It may just be feeding a sense of ego and vanity, but when 30 graduate students look to you during class for an answer or explanation, it tends to promote a sense of pride in one's intellectual abilities.
One year ago I didn't think things could get much worse, and right now things just keep getting better. I booked a flight down to Orlando for a conference this spring, and I'm working on applications to study abroad in Mexico this summer and then spend 6-8 weeks somewhere else on an internship. There's a good chance I could 4.0 my first semester of graduate school.
Much better than writing lesson plans for juvenile delinquents.
A major change since this time last year.
Last November through March was the lowest point I have ever been in my life. I worked my ass off trying to do my job, and the harder I worked the harder I fell when that work did not yield any more positive results. I would drag myself out of bed every morning, suffer through another futile day of trying to educate children who would fit better in a prison than a school, and then come home and lie on the couch from about 5:00 - 10:00 before pushing myself to try and develop another lesson plan. I went to see a counselor about it, and the basic analysis we came up with was that I hated my job and my situation, and that I wouldn't be happy until I could change those things.
I can't argue with him. Thanks, doc.
I haven't felt this empowered and alive since I left Ann Arbor 3 years ago. I thought maybe it was just associated with U of M and my positions there, but I feel the same sense of purpose and drive now that I did there. I actually enjoyed writing 18 pages for an 8-12 page final paper because once I started on it I was "in the zone". I enjoyed getting through a whole list of responsibilities in my office last week. For both my efforts, I got a 100% for the semester in that class, and a great evaluation from my supervisor.
Living back in Holland two years ago, I thought I was losing my mental sharpness. I felt like Charlie Gordon from Flowers for Algernon, knowing that he was regressing to his previously feeble intellect but unable to stop it. Being back in college, I feel like my mind is working at a million miles an hour. I feel like I'm mentally back at full strength again, and sometimes even stronger. It may just be feeding a sense of ego and vanity, but when 30 graduate students look to you during class for an answer or explanation, it tends to promote a sense of pride in one's intellectual abilities.
One year ago I didn't think things could get much worse, and right now things just keep getting better. I booked a flight down to Orlando for a conference this spring, and I'm working on applications to study abroad in Mexico this summer and then spend 6-8 weeks somewhere else on an internship. There's a good chance I could 4.0 my first semester of graduate school.
Much better than writing lesson plans for juvenile delinquents.
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
The Post-Season
You have to give Lloyd Carr a lot of credit. He's not whining (unlike certain other coaches in the nation). He's not politicking. He hasn't made that face that makes you think he's about ready to kill someone (you know what face I mean). But even though he's not saying it, a lot of other people out there are...
Once again, Michigan Football got screwed.
For your viewing pleasure, go check out these two links. The first was referenced by The Last Angry Man, and comes from ESPN. The second is from a blog I was introduced to that has the most comprehensive (albeit fantastically biased) commentary on all University of Michigan sports.
I don't necessarily think that the national championship should have been a rematch between OSU and U of M... but at the same time I don't think any team but Michigan deserves the #2 spot in the country. The National Championship game was already played, the national rankings have already been decided. What will happen on New Year's Day is nothing but a thinly veiled love fest that the rest of the nation will hold for teams that live in states where the sun shines.
Make no mistake, I hate The Ohio State University, its Buckeyes, and everything that comes out of Ohio. But at the same time, I want to see them crush Florida in a way that no amount of humiliation in the whole of human history has ever been witness to. I want OSU to run up the score to the point that there aren't enough lightbulbs left in the scoreboard to keep track of it all. I want to see the coaches, players, and fans of Florida reduced to nothing but broken, sniffling, and crying little girls.
At the same time, I hope the University of Southern California Trojans live up to the historical namesake of their mascot - their city destroyed, men slaughtered en masse, women and children sold into slavery. In the wilderness of Alaska and Canada, wolverines jump out of trees and maul grizzly bears to death. Wolverines are no larger than other mammals such as badgers, weasels, and beavers - they're just vicious little bastards who know how to kill. I hope to watch the same thing happen in Pasadena.
Go Blue.
Once again, Michigan Football got screwed.
For your viewing pleasure, go check out these two links. The first was referenced by The Last Angry Man, and comes from ESPN. The second is from a blog I was introduced to that has the most comprehensive (albeit fantastically biased) commentary on all University of Michigan sports.
I don't necessarily think that the national championship should have been a rematch between OSU and U of M... but at the same time I don't think any team but Michigan deserves the #2 spot in the country. The National Championship game was already played, the national rankings have already been decided. What will happen on New Year's Day is nothing but a thinly veiled love fest that the rest of the nation will hold for teams that live in states where the sun shines.
Make no mistake, I hate The Ohio State University, its Buckeyes, and everything that comes out of Ohio. But at the same time, I want to see them crush Florida in a way that no amount of humiliation in the whole of human history has ever been witness to. I want OSU to run up the score to the point that there aren't enough lightbulbs left in the scoreboard to keep track of it all. I want to see the coaches, players, and fans of Florida reduced to nothing but broken, sniffling, and crying little girls.
At the same time, I hope the University of Southern California Trojans live up to the historical namesake of their mascot - their city destroyed, men slaughtered en masse, women and children sold into slavery. In the wilderness of Alaska and Canada, wolverines jump out of trees and maul grizzly bears to death. Wolverines are no larger than other mammals such as badgers, weasels, and beavers - they're just vicious little bastards who know how to kill. I hope to watch the same thing happen in Pasadena.
Go Blue.
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