Help with Shakespeare

I picked up a 3 day gig teaching English at Holland High School, and the lesson plan just says to stretch Hamlet (the one with Mel Gibson) out for 3 days. It was started yesterday, so we're talking 4 days of 50 minute classes for a 2 hour movie. I take as much time as I can with attendance and announcements, and leave a few minutes for discussion at the end, but I just don't know if I can fill the time. One idea I've had is to bring Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead as a last ditch time filler, but having never seen it I don't know if any high school student would get it. I'm going to rent it tonight and watch it anyway, but if anyone (MW I'm looking at you) has seen it and can give some input, it would be greatly appreciated.

Feelin' Old

I had a dream I was trying to either write papers, finish projects, or study for finals for 5 classes all in one weekend. I don't know if the "Oh shit, I haven't studied for finals" dream is something that stays with you through your whole life, or if it was a reaction to spending time in East Lansing this weekend. While celebrating Mikey B's birthday with some kids from West Ottawa, I definitely felt a little out of place. Not just because I was in East Lansing, but the sense of feeling out of place in a group of college kids in general. I felt it this summer when I worked with a younger staff that would be returning this fall as students while I was already 8 months post-graduation, and I felt it this weekend.

I don't think this would be so bad if I actually felt like an adult in its place. But instead, I am stuck in this crappy state of limbo where I'm too old to act like an irresponsible college kid, but not old enough to have any of the positive trappings of adulthood. I don't fit in running with the college crowd at the bars, and I can't afford to visit and keep up with my friends who are working. None of them are raking in a ton of cash, but at least they have a steady source of income. I went through 5 years at U of M and all I got was this lousy diploma.

I know this is a recurring discussion from me and from my blog, but the holiday season keeps pushing it to the forefront. With every relative or friend who's back in town I see, it means another explanation of how the current state of the economy and school systems has left me subbing part time and working at the Gap, but that despite this I am not a loser.

Time Traveling

I talked to St. Louis girl for about an hour on the phone tonight. We did some very cursory catching up on the main events of our lives in the last 10 years, and she told me about some of my other friends from back in the day and their last known whereabouts. If any of you are really curious about more details, I can talk to you in more depth over e-mail, but suffice to say this is a very intriguing situation that I hope to continue to be able to talk about.

Out of the Blue

I checked my e-mail after getting back from work at the Gap this evening, and received a message from someone I have not seen or talked to in nearly 10 years. As many of you know, before I lived in Holland I spent all of elementary and middle school in a small town in Missouri about an hour west of St. Louis. When I was in 8th grade, my parents decided they had had enough of living away from home, and started planning to move back to Michigan. For me at the time, my whole life was in Missouri, and coupled with teenage angst was not at all happy about moving.

Though I successfully adjusted by about halfway through Freshman year of high school, at the time I was quite literally forced to leave all my friends behind. Chief among these friends was the core group of Mike, Nick, and Charlie. And then there was the girl. Angie. She just moved to Missouri that year, and though we were never "going out", we became very close friends.

She e-mailed me because she's now living in Detroit.

It was one of those "I don't know if you remember me, I hope this is the right person" e-mails, so I replied to her letting her know that she got the right person. I have no idea what prompted her to track me down, but all I know is that this is the sort of crazy, out-of-left field thing that just might make my life exciting for the first time in a long time.

Back From Hiatus

I'm so ashamed... I briefly turned in to one of those slacker bloggers who only posts like once a week. However shall I regain your trust that The Rant will be updated with the frequency you have all come to expect? Eh... I'll figure something out.

So, unfortunately, there has been no radical whirlwind of change in my life that has kept me from blogging. After a paperwork day and a training day, I've now officially been put on the schedule at the Gap. We had our Holiday Planning meeting on Sunday to discuss sales promotions and policies during the holiday rush, so let me tell you was that ever exciting. It was mandatory for the whole staff, so seeing all of my coworkers confirmed my suspicion that aside from the management and like one other person, I'm the only one who's not a minor. So far the managers love me because I actually work, unlike the rest of the staff who congregate in the fitting room area and gossip. Sigh... By the way, if you want a 15% off card for use the first weekend of December let me know... I have "Friends and Family" discount cards to give to people.

For good or for ill, I started trying to play Halo 2 on my brother's X-Box. It took me forever to think of a good, unique username, since 350,000 other people have signed up before me and taken all the ones I could think of. I finally came up with one this afternoon, and jumped in where angels fear to tread. Thanks to The Captain I got a free 2 month trial of X-Box Live, so I'm trying to hold my own against 12 year olds in the most basic matches in order to slowly get a handle on how to effectively kill them. Probably a month before Halo 3 is released I'll be good enough to actually jump into random games and not be totally helpless.

So, if I'm not blogging or trying to explain the difference between loose-fit and relaxed-fit jeans, I'll be in Halo-land bitch-slapping 12-year-olds with a rifle stock.

A Little of This, a Little of That

No coherent theme for today's show, just a few random thoughts.

1. You've Lost that Lovin' Feeling
Last night was the annual Treehouse of Horror season premier for The Simpsons. As many have feared, there wasn't a single thing that made me laugh in the episode. It barely held my interest. It was a tired rehash of previous ideas at best, a parody of itself at worst. It was like a Family Guy episode instead of a Simpsons episode. I thought last season showed some promise in reversing the downward trend, but last night took a decidedly sharp plunge. In the past the Treehouse of Horror allowed for some of the most creative and innovative ideas, but last night was just plain sad.

2. The Sound and the Fury
I don't know if it was just named since it only started in full today, or if it was just declassified, but the current major offensive against insurgent stronghold Fallujah is named Operation Phantom Fury. That's how you name a military operation. It harkens back to the good names like Operation Overlord and Operation Desert Storm, not the boring names like Enduring Freedom.

3. Going Dutch
I subbed at Holland High School today, and my continuing experience with the Holland School system makes me even more grateful for having gone to West Ottawa on the North side of town instead. The administration has no idea what's going on, the building seems to have been designed by the monkeys that they couldn't get to use typewriters, and it would appear that on any given day half of the English department is out of the building. By contrast, I was at Grand Haven High School on Friday. The building is like a temple to education, and it seems to be a tightly run ship.

New Stuff - No Politics (for now)

As alluded to in the previous post, the Star Wars Episode III teaser trailer came out on Thursday. After watching it about half a dozen times, I can safely say HOLY SHIT it's going to be awesome! I don't want to hear it from all of you who didn't like Episodes I and II - I'm excited about it and I think it's going to be worth the 20 year wait. Between armies of Wookies, the birth of Darth Vader, and more Natalie Portman hotness, what's not to love?

Also of note, today was my first day "orientation" at the Gap. I filled out my paperwork, promised I wouldn't sexually harass anyone, and got my discount card. Who knows what life in the retail world over the holiday season will bring, but it'll beat sitting at home waiting for substitute jobs that aren't coming.

Moving Forward

The election is over, and George W. Bush received a majority of popular and electoral votes. We can either spend the next four years baying for blood, or we can try to put the divisiveness of the campaigns behind us. I'm not going to spend another post going into why I support him - you know why, and nothing you can say will change my mind about it. Likewise, nothing I say will change your opinions.

In the last few posts and their subsequent comments, tempers raged and flared. I lashed out at the assumption made by many people around me that the only possible explanation for my views is a lack of information, implying that I just wasn't enlightened enough to agree with them. Never did it cross their minds that it took four long years of introspection and analysis to develop my political ideology.

I took cheap shots at the liberals during the campaign, and I had even more cheap shots taken at me. I sincerely hope that now that the campaigns are over, rational thought will replace the primal mudslinging that has characterized the political discussions of the last few months. I think you may have some ideas worth hearing, but I'm not going to listen when you preface it by calling me a war-mongering ideologue.

I don't want to have to spend every post replying to 6 comments worth of the same rhetoric. The Star Wars Episode III - Revenge of the Sith trailer is going live online any minute now, and I want to be able to talk about that instead.

First Things First

1. With 98% of Ohio results reporting in, Kerry and everyone else last night knew that there were not enough outstanding votes to take the lead back from Bush. Edwards was the one who kept pushing to never give up until every vote had been counted, come Hell or high water.

2. After being surrounded by them for 5 years, I can say that most lawyers are, actually, evil. If you're ever in doubt, just talk to someone hoping to go to U of M's Law School. Kerry and Edwards had their private jets with "legal SWAT teams" ready to go challenge every vote in the nation. That's what I call a lot of lawyers.

3. Yes, right now the nation is divided on all of the hot issues that marked this campaign. In both Kerry's concession speech and Bush's acceptance speech, they addressed their concerns over the bipartisan polarity that exists and both made the first statements toward bringing both sides back together. Just like Reagan did in 1984 and Clinton did in 1996, I think Bush's second term will make great efforts to reconcile the harsh division of the government and the nation. What doesn't help is people like John Edwards, who in his introduction of Kerry this afternoon went out of his way to enumerate the causes of division in the nation, and even describe the situation as "Two Americas". It's this sort of rabid hatred of the administration by the ultra liberal left and sanctimoniousness of the far right that need to be purged for us to move forward.

4. Loss of privacy? You can't decry the homeland security measures of the administration one minute and demand complete immunity from all searches and seizures the next. I've not lost any of my privacy, and I'm guessing none of you have either. If you're not doing something illegal, you shouldn't have to worry about someone getting a warrant against you. If the FBI, NSA, CIA, ATF, and other agencies whose job it is to ensure national security have to answer to the media for every operation they conduct then they have no ability to do their job. Despite all the rampant conspiracy theorists out there, we are not going to have Marshall law, or a loss of civil liberties under this administration or any other.

5. Lies and deception? You're right, I'm sorry, every other person in a position of authority throughout human history is completely honest and blame free except for those in the Bush administration. Did the President make decisions based on intelligence reports that were completely infallible? No, he saw the same intelligence reports that Clinton had seen, that Al Gore would have seen, and he made his decision based on the best information available. If that information was not reliable, then whoever provided it should be held accountable. OH WAIT, he was! George Tenet resigned as director of the CIA.

6. Government sponsored religion? We were, and still are, a Nation under God. Whether people like it or not, we are a faith-based nation. This is not to say we are a theocracy by any means, but we are undeniably a nation whose religion is consistently front and center in our lives. Whoa, did I miss the creation of the First Church of the United States? Did we add a cross to our flag when I wasn't looking? Sure, it says "In God we Trust" on our money. But it doesn't say a Nation under one God. We are a Nation under Jehovah, The Holy Trinity, God of Abraham, Allah, and dozens of other names that we each give to God. Nobody ever said which god you had to believe in, or even that you believe in anything. But you're right, we should totally abandon all churches and other agencies with religious affiliation and forbid them from carrying out charitable works and welfare. Instead of helping out those local institutions who know the disadvantaged in their communities, we should create massive federal help centers paid for by magical funding, not middle class tax hikes.

Give it up Jackass!

Kerry, you sniveling weasel, concede to the fact that you've lost Ohio. Even if 90% of the provisional ballots are for you, it's not enough to reverse The President's lead. Edwards gave his little Howard Dean-esque rallying cry in Boston, and the masses were promptly told to go home. The only support you and the Democratic Party has is from the bourgeois lawyers in the Northeast, so I don't know what else you're still expecting. Go drown your sorrows in a bottle of ketchup.

Kerry claims to care only about ensuring the democratic process for everyone in the country, regardless of what the outcome is. And, in true fashion, after saying this last week he'll call out his army of lawyers just like his running mate to litigate this nation within an inch of its life this week.

Well, it's 3:30 in the morning, and since I'm not working tomorrow I might as well stay up to see what happens in the Reagan Building. Bush is waiting for one more state to be called before making a speech, and since he's clearly ahead in Iowa, Nevada, and New Mexico I don't think it will be a problem.

Countdown to Chaos

Thanks to The Last Angry Man for backing me up. I know my previous post may have been a bit over the top, but sufficed to say I have a great deal of anxiety over the idea of an America under John Kerry. I simply don't trust him and his policies. Unlike the rhetoric of anti-Bush voters, my distrust of Kerry is based on his weak at best, treasonous at worst, record in the Senate and not on some unjustified hatred of him as a person.

Granted, our government is designed so that no matter how much things change, the more they stay the same. There are enough checks and balances to prevent any sudden swing towards any radical policy. And sure, in his own way, deluded and irrational as I may view it, I'm sure Kerry really does believe that he has the nation's best interests in mind. But, not only do I not agree with the ways he wants to do things, I don't believe Kerry actually has any realistic plans to do the things he says he will.

Into the Lion's Den

I barely survived the afternoon spent with my mom's family in Lansing. My dad and I arrived around halftime - two Republican Wolverines in a house full of Socialist Spartans. My brother is at MSU, two aunts and my grandfather are alumni, and one uncle is on the faculty there. My mom had been there since last night, and had explained to my extended family that I was voting for Bush. They didn't want to hear why, they were too busy trying to convince me I was wrong and just needed to hear Kerry's ideas one more time. For those of you still dumb enough to be making a gametime decision in the voting booth, let me give you something to chew on. This is why I'm voting for Bush.

Welcome to John Kerry's America...
International Policy
Kerry will hold true to his words, and pull US troops out of Iraq within the first 2 years of his presidency. Since he loves Vietnam so much, just picture Saigon and you'll get an idea of how this will happen. This will not be victory with honor, or even a tactical retreat. No, he'll pull the troops out right in the middle of a mission and leave the fragile Iraqi democracy to the wolves. This will show Iran that we really don't care about the Middle East anymore, and they will promptly test out all of their new missiles on Israel.

After pulling out the troops, he'll give France and Germany back their oil fields in Iraq in the first of many attempts to bend over backwards to please Old Europe. In case you're wondering, France and Germany had no moral objections to participating in the creation of a Democratic Iraq - they only resisted because it meant losing the oil fields they had been giving Saddam money and food for, both of which went towards building his army instead of helping the Iraqi people.

So after completely abandoning the War on Terror, Kerry will sit atop the Ivory Tower of the UN rubbing elbows with other losers like Kofi Annan, all the while claiming to be deeply concerned about crises and tragedies around the world. Kerry will slowly retreat every American asset back within our borders, and proceed to cower here hoping that nobody bothers us. Being from Massachusetts, he wants to make the US a "City on the Hill" where we can talk about how great we are instead of actually doing something. And in proud UN tradition, we'll sit atop our hill just like the UN peace-keepers did in Rwanda, watching the rest of the world murder itself.

Domestic Policy
The latest video released from Osama Bin Laden is basically threatening the US to vote for John Kerry. Personally, if Bin Laden tells me to vote for Kerry, that's even more reason to vote for Bush. Bin Laden is hoping that the US will go the way of Spain and elect a new leader who will cave into the demands of terrorists. Bin Laden knows that if Kerry is elected Al Qaeda will be free to rebuild itself and do whatever it wants. They've been planning something big for a long time, and Kerry will blissfully ignore that while he invites Bin Laden to Camp David for tea and cookies. As a result, I pray that I'm wrong, if Kerry is elected there will be another attack on the US before the end of 2005. I don't think it will be in the same scope or design as the World Trade Center attacks, I think it will be something designed to kill as many innocents and as many Jews as possible. Think along the lines of blowing up Jewish schools or synagogues on Yum Kippur. Think along the lines of blowing up a High School State Championship Game, or a prom. They don't hate our freedom, they don't hate our military... they hate us. They want to kill us, and they'll try to kill as many of us as they can once Kerry makes it a lot easier for them to do so.

Kerry has promised to add two new divisions to the US military. Well, that's going to be hard to do since everyone that can get out will get out since Kerry has no support from our troops. And is building the military free? No, that will be the first new tax you'll pay. Oh but don't worry, there will be plenty of other taxes to keep it company. You want a large government controlled health care system? Well, you'll pay for one but your coverage and services won't improve any. You want social security reform? Oh you'll get it, but it'll mean paying 20% of your paycheck to Social Security.

Kerry's domestic policy is to create a socialist state. I know you hippies think socialism will be great, but why don't you go ask Europe how it's working out for them. European nations don't spend any of their national budget on defense, have 20-40% income taxes to fund all their government programs, and still don't have the same level of service provided to their citizens that the US does.

"You're guilty conscience may force you to vote Democratic, but deep in your hearts you long for a cold-hearted Republican to lower taxes, brutalize criminals, and rule you like a king!" - Sideshow Bob

Good God do I Hate Grant Morrison

I warn you now, this is going to be a nerdy fanboy post. Any of you who have spent any amount of time around me know that about 8 years ago I got back into reading comic books on a regular basis. I started off with just a few titles a month that I followed, and the list grew until eventually I was buying about 15 different titles a month at my high point in college. Since then I have gradually pared the number down, and last fall when I started student teaching and thus no longer making money, I stopped cold turkey.

Well, this summer I was living back on campus right down the street from the comic book store, and making money again to afford to purchase said comics. With the bane of Art Fair came the hidden blessing of the comic book store's 3 for $1 bins out on the sidewalk. So, for about $25 I was able to pick up most of what I had missed in the preceding six months, albeit with a severely shorter list of titles I would continue to follow. But, even after this there were still some large gaps in the issues I had, so I only flipped through the new issues instead of really reading them.

About a week ago, enter X-Men Legends for my Gamecube. I had been waiting for this game for months, and it spurred a rededication to getting caught up in my comics. An online order later, I think I've filled in the gaps and am ready to get up to the present.

The blessing of buying a year's worth of comics is that you don't have to wait a month to see how the story ends. I just finished reading the final two arcs of a writer named Grant Morrison, though to call him a writer is using the term loosely. This man is a hack of the highest order, and I hope he never again even writes on the back of a napkin. His story was convoluted, made huge jumps in both narrative progression and logic, and did not exhibit even the slightest grasp on the most basic aspects of the characters. That is, when he used the main characters, since half of what he did focused on some guy who didn't exist a page earlier and all of a sudden we're supposed to view him as the second coming. Just flipping through what the new writer has, I'm actually excited to be reading again. From what I've seen, the art is exponentially better, and the story doesn't require hitting myself in the head in order to get through.

He's actually treating the characters and their world in the way they're supposed to be used, instead of trying to be some daring, risk-taking, self-aggrandizing, post-modern hack.

So there you go. Fanboy rant over. Come back next time for a "what if?" sneak peek of (Heaven forbid) John Kerry's America.

Can't Sleep... Clowns Will Eat Me

This past weekend, I had some disturbing dreams. Not nightmares, not even bad dreams really. But the kind of dream that I wake up from eternally thankful that it was not reality. The first was Thursday night, and the second was Saturday. Seeing this every-other-day pattern, I wondered if they would continue last night, but thankfully they did not.

Like I said - the dreams were not that bad. But it was the unexpected nature of their subjects that got to me. Both of them were set in college, despite the fact that it's been nearly a year since I graduated. And though I graduated almost a year ago, since I spent the final semester student teaching it's been a year and a half since I last took exams and studied like a college student. And both dreams involved my ex-girlfriend - which is even more odd since I haven't seen her in over 2 years, and have not thought about her in months.

In the first dream Thursday night, I was in Holland and had to drive back to Ann Arbor for a final exam. The exam was a combination of two History classes I took - one Junior year and one Senior year. Though the subject was more closely related to the course taken Junior year, my unbelievable lack of preparation and complete befuddlement of the subject was much too close to the reality of the class I took Senior year. Not only was I running against the clock to get back for the exam, but I needed to get back early so that I could review notes and materials after having not been to the class in a month. In the dream, I arrived on campus with time to spare, and was headed to the lecture hall my exam was in for some last minute cramming. Along the way, I ran into the aforementioned ex-girlfriend, facing down a scenario much like what happened in real life. In the dream we were in the process of breaking-up, and in reality I ran into her like this right after I had broken up with her, and in both cases she had gone from acceptance of this to the need for argument and discussion over the matter. I had to deal with it in real life, but in this dream scenario I was lucky enough to wake up before finishing the confrontation.

I don't remember the details of the second dream from Saturday all that well. All I do remember is that the narrative of the dream involved the ex-girlfriend and I in a much more stable and happy relationship than ever really existed in my waking life.

It's a bit disconcerting to have her intruding into my dreams, and a bit confusing. As I said, I have not given her so much as a casual thought in months. There's no unrequited love on my part - I took great comfort and solace in the fact that I broke up with her on my terms only after trying every conceivable course to mend our relationship. The psychology major in me is trying to figure out if I was actually dreaming of her, if she represented something greater and more metaphorical, or if there is some unconscious conflict within myself that needs to be resolved.

I guess there's a good chance that I'm on the brink of a High Fidelity-esque "What does it all mean?" top 5 countdown to figure out where I am in my current state of romantic stagnation, but I don't think so. I have no plans to drag out the little black book and try to piece together the rended scraps of my love life.

Keep on Trucking

I did the math before I left, and I made the correct guess that my car would roll over 100,000 miles at some point during my weekend trip to Chicago. Of course, I have a digital odometer so it didn't actually roll over, but I like to use the vernacular in describing this event. I had my digital camera with me, planning to take a "before and after" shot of 99,999 and then 100,000 miles, but I ended up not doing it. Sure, it's a monumental achievement in the life of a car, but I decided not one that needed to be saved for posterity.

Before I left on Friday, I got an oil change on said automobile. Reaching what is undoubtedly a "higher mileage" level, I chose to put some more premium oil in the V-Dub. I don't really know if it was worth the extra $5 (well, $10, but I guess I can get a $5 mail in rebate that will arrive in 6-8 weeks).

I've got a few other things on my mind, but want to give each one its own dedicated post. Keep checking back over the next few days for some posts with a tad more substance than these sort of benign updates.

We Named the Dog Indiana

Played a round of golf this morning with Mails and Opaluski, and by the time I got to the back 9 I was doing pretty well, all things considered. It's amazing how much further south Indy really is... it was a beatiful warm and sunny day. It was perfect weather for golf - just cool enough that you weren't warm with pants on and warm enough to wear short sleeves.

While the weather down here is mild, nothing can make up for the surroundings. We went to a Buffalo Wild Wings for lunch after golf, and I have not seen a more wretched hive of scum and villany in some time. Everywhere I looked, Colts' fans running up and down the ailes, yelling, jumping, drinking, throwing things - and that was the women. Even in civilization it's the boonies down here.

Lately I've been thinking a lot about where I'm going to head this summer/fall. After the job search in Michigan turned up nothing, and barring the complete retirement of an entire generation of teachers, I think I've accepted that I may be heading out yonder. I know that the Carolinas, Florida, and Texas are in need of teachers, but I refuse to move to any of those states. Right now the top list (given that Michigan will always be #1) is made up of Colorado, Virginia, New York (upstate), and Pennsylvania. I know California is hiring, and I know people out there who are trying to convince me to move out there, but I don't think I could live in California. So, as the months of subbing go on, we'll see where I end up this next school year.

Blogging 'Cross the USA

Tonight's blog comes to you from rainy and dreary Indianapolis. I left Holland last night to meet up with Malis in Chicago, and then we continued down I-65 into Indy. While I hate driving in the rain and in the country in the dark, I love driving in cities at night. Ever since I was a kid, I love the lighted tunnels and night skylines of big cities. We'd drive through St. Louis, Detroit, Milwaukee, and other Midwestern cities while on vacations. I never want to live in a big city, and city life does not hold the same awe for me as it does many others, but I do love driving through.

Tonight's plan is haning out with the boys for poker and more Jeopardy on Playstation. Since U of M pulled it out against Purdue, I don't have to worry about hearing about it from the 3 MSU kids. It should be a good night, and we'll see if my previous poker luck holds out.

Free at last!

I actually got out of Kalamazoo on Wednesday, but after two weeks of not being able to go anywhere I haven't been sitting down at my computer long enough to blog since I've been home. All in all, now that I got my paychecks, there are far worse ways to earn $2500. The other people there with me were a good group, so were I to do it again I doubt I would be as fortunate. I don't think I could do another 2 week stay, but a few days for a few hundred bucks would be worth it.

In my absence, it seems that there has been raging debate and accusations about metrosexuality. Thank you to the Watergirl for defending me and Wilson for putting things into a more proper perspective. And Jon, shut up. Showering regularly, wearing clean clothes, and not peeing on things does not a metrosexual make. I buy stuff at J. Crew, and I did buy my iPod... but I hate sushi, I hate spending more than $3 on any soap, shampoo, or other bathroom products, and I don't even know what else defines a metrosexual.

Anyway... it's good to be home.

My Life as a Lab Rat - Days 14 and 15

Did anyone celebrate Columbus Day yesterday? Did you bring your neighbors blankets infected with smallpox and plant the Spanish flag on their lawn? Well, you should have.

I'm finally out of here tomorrow morning, and it can't come soon enough. After two weeks in here, this weekend is going to be a glutton fest. Not all at once, but I want:
- Buffalo Wings
- Chinese Food
- Pizza and breadsticks
- Chocolate
- Chalupas

After all this food, and after sitting on my ass for two weeks, I'm also eager to get into a workout routine. Now that I've got $1 a visit membership to Ultimate Fitness just like a mile away, and since I'm going to buy an Ipod with some of this cash, hopefully I can stick to it.

My Life as a Lab Rat - Day 13

Take that Michael Vick! Oh no, you're still adjusting to West Coast offense. Oh no, you're not going to start 5-0. HA!

We got some new people here for a different study, and I don't like them. Some chach that was watching the game with a few of us kept grabbing the remote and flipping to other channels. It's one thing to flip to another game during a commercial or halftime, but he was flipping to the Colts/Raiders in between downs. Hey, newsflash Chachie, you're in Michigan. It was a close game, and you've got six guys that are on the edge of their seats watching it. He looks like one of those damned stoner slacker hippie throwbacks, with his beard and scraggly hair, hemp necklace and hemp woven ski-cap. Go hug a tree, hippie.